status & mood

Dane Cook
Dane CookBack in Los Angeles. Watched Star Trek during wild turbulence. It was like we were being attacked by Romulan miners 4 watching the movie.Posted at 11:05 AM Nov 22 from Twitter
Mood: (none)
  • *Jennie*
    *Jennie* Posted 5 hours ago
    :-)
  • Kayli
    Kayli Posted 5 hours ago
    That is EXACTLY what was happening.
Dane CookMassive show in Calgary 2night. Over 15 thousand fans headed 2 the big show. It's going to be a hellofaride.
Posted at 10:48 PM Nov 21
  • Trish
    Trish Posted at 11:55 PM Nov 23
    cant wait for dec 31st!!
  • little lilly
    little lilly Posted at 11:46 PM Nov 23
    no fucking way
Dane CookCalgary I'm a resident tonight / tomorrow.
Posted at 7:30 AM Nov 21
  • Ann
    Ann Posted at 7:50 AM Nov 24
    M*Y*L*F* you might need to pull up an online dictionary. Funniest is a word. I suppose that you have called up ABC and ripped them one about America's Funniest Videos and told them it was wrong too? How about we focus in comments about Dane...and stop trying to give everyone a grammar lesson. Love ya Dane...you still rock!
  • nichole
    nichole Posted at 11:14 PM Nov 21
Dane CookCalgary. 40 min. I'm coming. Don't let me find you sleeping.
Posted at 5:48 AM Nov 21 from Twitter
Dane CookHeard about the car accident in Saskatoon. I'm holding the show 4 little bit 2 let every1 get in here. Pass it on.
Posted at 2:11 AM Nov 21 from Twitter
Dane CookISolated INcident the DVD is getting incredible reviews from fans all over. THANK YOU everyone. Laugh on!... http://bit.ly/5hd4dt
Posted at 10:15 PM Nov 20 from Twitter
Dane CookI just woke up in Saskatoon. Sorry but I had to write that somewhere & actually read it. Hi.
Posted at 6:16 PM Nov 20 from Twitter
Dane CookWinnipeg show was insane! Thanks every1. 1 of the best shows this tour. 15 thousand strong. Headed to Saskatoon in an hour.
Posted at 4:21 AM Nov 20 from Twitter
Dane CookI'm backstage in Regina, Canada right now. Soundcheck complete! Winnipeg later tonight for a couple of days. direct2dane@danecook.com
Posted at 12:26 AM Nov 19 from Twitter
  • Jeremy
    Jeremy Posted at 5:21 AM Nov 21
    Just bought isolated incedent, Funny shit man. Can't believe the douchebag anonimous@yahoo what a dick!!
  • Brenton
    Brenton Posted at 5:08 AM Nov 21
    good luck and have fun
Dane CookYES I DO! hey u're 2000 comedy central presents just came on and I was just wondering.do u still wish u were a snake? (via @JuvisaurusREX)
Posted at 2:05 AM Nov 18 from Twitter
  • Sheila
    Sheila Posted at 6:44 PM Nov 21
    dont read this. you will get kissed on the nearest possible friday by the love of your life. tomorrow will be the best day of your life. however if you dont post this comment to at least 3 peoples you will die within 2 days. now uv started readin dis dunt stop this is so scary. send this over to 5 people in 143 minutes when ur done press f6 and ur crushes name will appear on the screen in big letters. this is so scary because it actually work
  • Jake
    Jake Posted at 4:18 AM Nov 20
    dont read this. you will get kissed on the nearest possible friday by the love of your life. tomorrow will be the best day of your life. however if you dont post this comment to at least 3 peoples you will die within 2 days. now uv started readin dis dunt stop this is so scary. send this over to 5 people in 143 minutes when ur done press f6 and ur crushes name will appear on the screen in big letters. this is so scary because it actually work
Dane CookNICE! Its so sweet we even skinned our Homepage! ISolated INcident the DVD is out (via @ComedyCentral)
Posted at 2:04 AM Nov 18 from Twitter
  • X ♠The 6 Foot 7 Rated R StraightEdge Superstar♠ X
    dont read this. you will get kissed on the nearest possible friday by the love of your life. tomorrow will be the best day of your life. however if you dont post this comment to at least 3 peoples you will die within 2 days. now uv started readin dis dunt stop this is so scary. send this over to 5 people in 143 minutes when ur done press f6 and ur crushes name will appear on the screen in big letters. this is so scary because it actually work
  • Bobinoski
    Bobinoski Posted at 9:53 PM Nov 18
    dont read this. you will get kissed on the nearest possible friday by the love of your life. tomorrow will be the best day of your life. however if you dont post this comment to at least 3 peoples you will die within 2 days. now uv started readin dis dunt stop this is so scary. send this over to 5 people in 143 minutes when ur done press f6 and ur crushes name will appear on the screen in big letters. this is so scary because it actually work
Dane CookISolated INcident the DVD is out & on sale 2day! Grab it @ stores or dwnload it off iTunes here: http://bit.ly/4tVcd
Posted at 11:04 PM Nov 17 from Twitter
  • And Den!?
    And Den!? Posted at 8:58 PM Nov 18
    Posted 26 seconds ago dont read this. you will get kissed on the nearest possible friday by the love of your life. tomorrow will be the best day of your life. however if you dont post this comment to at least 3 peoples you will die within 2 days. now uv started readin dis dunt stop this is so scary. send this over to 5 people in 143 minutes when ur done press f6 and ur crushes name will appear on the screen in big letters. this is so scary because it actually work
  • -ROGUE MERCENARY-
    -ROGUE MERCENARY- Posted at 5:00 PM Nov 18
    Lol Cant wait to watch it bro.
Dane CookI learned this morning that Kevin Knox died. If you are asking yourself who Kevin Knox is then you really missed ou (cont) http://tl.gd/vbu7
Posted at 8:11 AM Nov 17 from Twitter
  • Terror Tay!
    Terror Tay! Posted at 8:10 AM Nov 20
    sorry for your loss. I hope you all know suicide silence is a death metal band btw.
  • Aileen
    Aileen Posted at 5:16 AM Nov 19
    Here's to a hilarious man. RIP Kevin Knox and thanks for all the laughs!
Dane CookMW2 on my 150" HD projector w/ 15 speakers hidden around my new theater room. I think I have an advantage. http://twitpic.com/p9heg
Posted at 8:42 PM Nov 12 from Twitter
  • Justin Towne   d[-_-]b
    Justin Towne d[-_-]b Posted at 11:07 AM Nov 21
    Actually the perferred size for competitive gaming is roughly around 22 inches. You have no advantage.
  • Aileen
    Aileen Posted at 5:20 AM Nov 19
    HOT DAMN! I'm jealous! Can I please come over and play?
Dane CookTexas, Arkansas, Illinois & Kentucky I'm per4ming 4 u this week. The ISolated INcident tour rages on! TICKETS:http://lnk.ms/4QG9T
Posted at 5:04 AM Nov 12
  • carl
    carl Posted at 7:39 AM Nov 17
    you fucking rock dude! stand up comedy is hard, but you make it look so easy!
  • wohblackbettyramalamalam
    Posted at 7:15 AM Nov 17
    Chicago by chance?
Dane CookFeeling better now. Got a lot off my mind with some new friends. I'm a lucky guy. Thanks for your well wishes!
Posted at 2:56 AM Nov 11 from Twitter
  • Last Of My Kind
    Last Of My Kind Posted at 2:18 AM Nov 18
    See this is how you should update.....you are a lucky guy.
  • Carli Mae
    Carli Mae Posted at 5:10 AM Nov 12
    someone needs to learn how to spell......
Dane Cookhttp://lnk.ms/4NDFK - Update b4 I fly away!
Posted at 4:17 AM Nov 9 from TwitVid
  • Geena Marie
    Geena Marie Posted at 3:40 AM Nov 17
    EVERYONE WHOSE DISSIN ME PLEASE SHUT UR FUCKING FACE!!! I'm just MAKING A FUCKIN STATEMENT UR ASSHOLES!!! God...go bug the hell outta someone else
  • *Dr. Dick  23 *
    *Dr. Dick 23 * Posted at 7:00 AM Nov 12
    the new call of dutty is the shit dude forxbox 360 i have a friend that can rapp come back to alaska
Dane CookHitting stage in 8 minutes here in Raleigh, North Carolina. I'm in rare form. After party u ask? It's onstage during the show.
Posted at 1:28 AM Nov 9 from Twitter
  • *Dr. Dick  23 *
    *Dr. Dick 23 * Posted at 7:02 AM Nov 12
    u r the god of the funny fuckers
  • ♫~COLETTE~♫
    ♫~COLETTE~♫ Posted at 11:16 PM Nov 9
    Enjoyed the show Dane! You're a real charmer!
Dane CookCongrats to the New England Patriots. Good win today. Moss is a machine. Brady is the oil. I'm a comedian.
Posted at 1:25 AM Nov 9 from Twitter
  • Jamie ♥
    Jamie ♥ Posted at 7:00 AM Nov 10
    Go Pats!
  • Carlos
    Carlos Posted at 11:09 PM Nov 9
    sorry dude ima dolfan
Dane CookIt's the 1st day of the rest of your life. http://bit.ly/1m4A1f
Posted at 12:00 AM Nov 9 from Twitter
Dane CookAt Hooters in Raleigh. Have not been here in years. Wings and tits. Yum!
Posted at 5:31 AM Nov 8 from Twitter
  • Jessica
    Jessica Posted at 9:11 PM Nov 10
    They have WiFi ya know.... LOL
  • Robin
    Robin Posted at 4:24 AM Nov 10
    haha
Dane CookI want to thank all the fans that showed up tonight and last night in Virginia. You really put me in a great mood. I needed this show!
Posted at 3:19 AM Nov 8 from Twitter
  •     STRUBLE aka *mS.sTaYz*
    STRUBLE aka *mS.sTaYz* Posted at 3:32 PM Nov 10
    I wanted to go :( I had to work!
  • *~Nicole~*
    *~Nicole~* Posted at 5:11 AM Nov 9
    no problem. any time! u were FANTACULAR last night (norfolk,va) it was my first comedy show ever...and definitely will be the best!
Posted at 12:48 AM Nov 8 from Twitter
  • Last Of My Kind
    Last Of My Kind Posted at 2:22 AM Nov 18
    Good luck chuck has been on alot lately.....it's funny movie....but I kinda think it was a ploy for you to fuck all these chicks haha.
  • Tiffany Marie
    Tiffany Marie Posted at 12:39 AM Nov 9
    Why do assholes leave comments? If u wanna be a dick to Dane, why is he one of your friends? Go fuck off, haters.
Dane CookFairfax/Norfolk-email a HOT/COOL pic w/ur tix direct2dane@danecook.com get PULLED bckstge! I'm checking them until/after show.
Posted at 11:45 PM Nov 6 from Twitter
  • Matt
    Matt Posted at 12:48 AM Nov 8
    dane dane dane dane dane dane dane you are fucking awesome
  • ANASTASIA BEAVERHOUSEN
    ANASTASIA BEAVERHOUSEN Posted at 10:06 PM Nov 7
    YOU WERE AMAZING ON STERN THE OTHER DAY! 4 OF MY FAVORITE MEN IN THE WORLD, TOGETHER ALL IN ONE ROOM DOING ONE SHOW. YOU,ARTIE, HOWARD AND FRED! PERFECTION!
Dane CookJust landed in Virginia. Thank you to all the fans waiting!
Posted at 9:39 PM Nov 6 from Twitter
Dane CookI'm on the news. Talking tour plus catch a glimpse of some of my next album. Just a taste. http://bit.ly/1lc2KH
Posted at 12:52 AM Nov 5 from Twitter
  • amy
    amy Posted at 9:30 PM Nov 6
    to the people who make the nasty comments on here i hope you realise it just makes you look like a total wank.
  • Jerrie
    Jerrie Posted at 6:56 PM Nov 6
    Hey! Dane just stopn by to say Hi! :)
Dane CookHave a hearty laugh w/ me & SPIN magazine. 10 THINGS NOT TO DO AT A CONCERT. http://bit.ly/1SRjiV
Posted at 11:51 PM Nov 4 from Twitter
  • Jo-E
    Jo-E Posted at 1:25 AM Nov 16
    hey you're so awesome. the other day I was having a rough time dealing with things and I watched good lick chuck and it made me feel so much better. send me a comment!!!!!!
  • Rachel
    Rachel Posted at 8:42 PM Nov 6
    GREAT. WHEN'S THE MAG COMING OUT?
Dane CookI just made my debut appearance on Howard Stern. Awesome time. He's a great guy. Can't wait to swing through again!
Posted at 2:44 PM Nov 4 from Twitter
  • open
    open Posted at 3:05 PM Nov 5
    You f*ckin rock.. You Made my Exgirl come back to me after I braught her to your show live..! THANK U :)
  • Grace
    Grace Posted at 2:37 AM Nov 5
    Let me get you in a new shiny website.. Web sales are up 70% this year. Dont throw away your business over something so simple! Call me today!
Dane CookWednesday Nov 4th I'm in studio w/ Stern. After that all over NYC including Alexa Chung. The 5th-MSG is about to rumble w/ laughter.
Posted at 1:00 AM Nov 3 from Twitter
  • Ryan
    Ryan Posted at 8:47 PM Nov 4
    I just shit my pants!!! ha ha just watched DC on Alex chung
  • ~*u just think u know me*~
    ~*u just think u know me*~ Posted at 2:56 PM Nov 4
    Only 91 comments? (im being nice and includin mine n that total) this has to be ur lamest status ever. ;) so when u headin to okc or dallas? Mwah
Dane CookAnytime u get mention w/ Weezer (1 of my favs since BLUE) from the Stone that is Rolling thats smile territory. http://bit.ly/CtrFP
Posted at 11:37 PM Nov 2 from Twitter
  • ♥Em~ily♥
    ♥Em~ily♥ Posted at 2:49 AM Nov 9
    omg u listen to weezer?!! IT'S MY FAVORITE BAND EVER!! say it ain't so! and the sweater song are amazing! I love their new album!
  • ¿tikki god™
    ¿tikki god™ Posted at 10:31 AM Nov 3
    Say it ain't so.......Rolling back to the good old days........
Dane CookYou've never seen me in an interview like this one. http://lnk.ms/2sVHr
Posted at 8:49 PM Nov 1
  • Ka~B
    Ka~B Posted at 11:32 PM Nov 2
    funny + hot ass = Sexy Dane :) <3
  • Kayla ♥
    Kayla ♥ Posted at 6:41 PM Nov 2
    love ur ass
Dane CookYou've never seen me in an interview like this one. http://bit.ly/1OJDYt
Posted at 8:46 PM Nov 1 from Twitter
  • Kelsey Ann
    Kelsey Ann Posted at 7:49 AM Nov 2
    lol hilarious
  • jacob
    jacob Posted at 3:08 AM Nov 2
    sausage McMuffin
Dane CookOh shit it's Halloween. And here I thought everyone was just a bunch of overdressed assholes.
Posted at 7:09 AM Nov 1 from Twitter
Dane CookTime for my weekly NOBODY TWEETS ON AN F'IN SATURDAY tweet. Unaired interview clip from my EXTRA interview. http://bit.ly/123djY
Posted at 6:48 PM Oct 31 from Twitter
  • Inez
    Inez Posted at 10:28 AM Nov 1
    add me
  • Brian
    Brian Posted at 9:10 AM Nov 1
    Quit twattin' your tweets, that's what old people do
Dane CookI just heard distant police sirens & thought to myself great what did I do now. Good way to start the day.
Posted at 2:23 PM Oct 27
  • Brandy
    Brandy Posted at 12:36 AM Nov 2
    i thought they were coming for me..
  • DMF <33 JRS 10-5-07
    DMF <33 JRS 10-5-07 Posted at 2:03 PM Oct 31
    fuck shoes
Dane CookIf I retweet a tweet that has not been posted yet is that a pretweet?
Posted at 2:54 AM Oct 20 from Twitter
Dane Cookhttp://lnk.ms/2J6v6 - The first 4 shows of the IS-IN tour have been nothing short of spectacular...
Posted at 9:53 PM Oct 19 from TwitVid
  • TAM~TAM
    TAM~TAM Posted at 4:49 AM Oct 27
    You should be a guest host on WWE Raw. I think it would be hilarious to see what you'd say to some of those guys.
  • mark F.u.B.
    mark F.u.B. Posted at 1:39 AM Oct 27
    Your hilarious pls don't stop doing comedy
Dane Cookhttp://lnk.ms/2Bx4J - Just landed in Wisconsin.
Posted at 6:28 AM Oct 18 from TwitVid
Dane Cookhttp://lnk.ms/3cgmM - Update from the road on the ISolated INcident Tour.
Posted at 3:06 AM Oct 18 from TwitVid
Dane CookIn Nashville, TN. Making this hotel my hometel until tomorrow night.
Posted at 6:14 AM Oct 17
  • Whitney
    Whitney Posted at 2:54 PM Oct 27
    Your Nashville show was great! Had a blast!
  • devonnn.ツ
    devonnn.ツ Posted at 11:51 PM Oct 24
    cute ass girls add me, (:
Dane CookIn my hotel room here in Columbus, Ohio. Resting 4 the show. Thinking funny things to say in funny ways.
Posted at 5:24 PM Oct 15
  • Megs
    Megs Posted at 3:54 AM Oct 20
    Wow. People write the weirdest comments. Anywho. Last month my brother and I went to Costa Rica (wicked time). You helped us get through some rough roads. We laughed so hard we had tears. Some great memories with my brother were because of you. Thanks for making us laugh. :)
  • ~BrAnDiE~
    ~BrAnDiE~ Posted at 6:07 AM Oct 17
    U make me horny :P........I love watchin u....ur GORGEOUS!!!! Do u ever get tired of all of us throwin ourselves at u....prob not....sooooo HOT!!!! I LOVE U!!!
Dane CookIt's raining so hard here in Los Angeles. Great night to fall in love & kiss out in it while dancing 2 the Dirty Dancing soundtrack.
Posted at 1:59 AM Oct 14 from Twitter
  • Poeticleyncrrect
    Poeticleyncrrect Posted at 10:27 PM Nov 17
    A girls wet dream funny boy... You described my dream date.
  • Damsel N Distress
    Damsel N Distress Posted at 3:27 PM Oct 27
    that would be funny as hell to see lol u remind me of my friend brandon kinda look like him too hes a pisces also.
Dane CookDriving me crazy. What was the name of the weird vehicle that sprays foam all over every1 in Willie Wonka & the Chocolate Factory?
Posted at 8:34 PM Oct 13 from Twitter
  • ♥Nellie Kitty♥*RAWR*
    ♥Nellie Kitty♥*RAWR* Posted at 9:08 PM Oct 14
    wonka wash backwards
  • Lil boo
    Lil boo Posted at 7:45 PM Oct 14
    MY FAVE Movie!!!yay i see you already have your answer so i'll just tell you that I love that movie
Dane CookGo to a SEARCH ENGINE. Type 3 random words. 1st: a SOUND; 2nd: a nearby OBJECT 3rd: an ACTION. Search. WTF comes up?
Posted at 2:46 AM Oct 13 from Twitter
  • Andrea
    Andrea Posted at 7:32 PM Oct 15
    i tried it out and i put in: ding, bottle, and jump and i got this really crazy video of some strange ppl here's the site u might find it interesting. http://lnk.ms/21dYB
  • •.mεℓℓs™.•
    •.mεℓℓs™.• Posted at 5:41 PM Oct 15
    i put sharpener, dog, then seatbelt. i got "High Visibility MEDIUM Orange Vest Safety Dog Harness " lmao wth?!
Dane CookHeyou email a HOT/COOL pic w/ur tix direct2dane@danecook.com get PULLED bckstge! I'm checking them personally so don't be lame.
Posted at 1:47 AM Oct 13 from Twitter
  • Dances with Zombies!
    Dances with Zombies! Posted at 11:59 PM Oct 16
    WHORES!!!!!
  • CrysTAL :)
    CrysTAL :) Posted at 8:43 PM Oct 16
    So how can I send a cool picture with tickets if you never come close to where I live Dane? haha....love ya anyway!
Dane CookLas Vegas. Great start 4 my tour. OH, MI, TN, WI I will see you next week. http://bit.ly/3qge5c for tix!
Posted at 2:47 AM Oct 12 from Twitter
  • Lisa
    Lisa Posted at 4:03 AM Oct 15
    Tehachapi, California...great little town with so many that would LOVE to see you!!!
  • .:.♥.:.MrS. EaRLy.:.♥.:.
    .:.♥.:.MrS. EaRLy.:.♥.:. Posted at 8:33 AM Oct 14
    u should come to ky. nothin exciting ever happens here:)
Dane CookMy gurl MC-yrus threw me mad like in a rap b4 jetting from Twitterland. I'm workin on my shoutout while on tour. http://bit.ly/KTze
Posted at 10:35 PM Oct 10 from Twitter
  •  †IvanDaGreat†™
    †IvanDaGreat†™ Posted at 2:48 AM Oct 12
    fk yea
  • DJ Stomp
    DJ Stomp Posted at 2:30 AM Oct 12
    Dane, we're all cheering you on!!!! You can beat E-TORETTES SYNDROME!
Dane Cook“@danecook thats sweet-- callin the boston garden "The Garden" on your schedule” -@celtic52034 That's what it is!
Posted at 10:29 PM Oct 9 from Twitter
  • Jared (AKA J-Rad)
    Jared (AKA J-Rad) Posted at 10:33 PM Oct 10
    Go Celtics! (& Red Sox!)
  • Lost Kauzz
    Lost Kauzz Posted at 9:38 PM Oct 10
    I heard Tom Brady Gets his balls washed by Billy Belichick. The only thing brady gets in febuary is an STD. Why couldnt they beat the giants in their last appearance, fuck the pats, I hope their plane crashes.
Dane CookTake meeting. Jog the canyon. Chicken salad. Call Miley get her back on Twitter. Car wash. Baseball game. Sleep. Vegas.
Posted at 6:34 PM Oct 8 from Twitter
  • Shortie loves her EZE!
    Shortie loves her EZE! Posted at 10:25 AM Oct 11
    Go on a poker run on the bike, come home, play with kiddies, make dinner, get dumby algebra, english comp, history, and psych homework done, get kids bathed and ready for school, try to avoid all them games on fagbook, get hubby ready for classes tomorrow, clean up dinner, bath myself, hopefully, then I might get some sleep...ugh ugh and total ugh! HEY MILEY...GET UR BUTT BACK ON TWITTER..hope that helps!
  • Aimee
    Aimee Posted at 3:43 AM Oct 10
    Busy day Dane!....Me; Find a way to work, whats for lunch, Is work ever going to end, go home, mop the floors the dogs shit all over, fix dinner, hang Halloween decorations, Facebook, Myspace, 2 motrins, Sleep! Thanks for aasking!!!
Dane CookI'm always busy, planning, developing, updating, traveling. Tonight I'm going to do something I've never done before. Nothing.
Posted at 5:42 AM Oct 7 from Twitter
  • Nice
    Nice Posted at 12:54 AM Oct 9
    nice one!
  • ~27~
    ~27~ Posted at 12:38 AM Oct 9
    hafuckingha
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