status & mood

Michelle
Michelle- If you could read my mind, you'd need therapy.Posted 3 hours ago from Twitter
Mood: (none)
Michelle- It's Happy Hour.....time to break out the Voodoo dolls!
Posted at 9:38 PM Nov 24 from Twitter
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Michelle-I saw a billboard that read: Need help? Call JESUS 1-800-555-3787. Out of curiosity I did, and a Mexican with a lawnmower showed up!
Posted at 5:51 PM Nov 24 from Twitter
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Michelle...Sex is like a game of cards....if you don't have a good player, then you better have a good hand!
Posted at 5:46 PM Nov 24 from Twitter
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Michelle- I sold my soul to the devil, but got really great boobs in the deal!
Posted at 2:29 PM Nov 24 from Twitter
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Michelle....I think it's been too long since we sent a man to the moon.....I have someone in mind.....
Posted at 4:20 AM Nov 24 from Twitter
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Michelle.....EARTHQUAKE!! Oh, noooo, sorry, it was just you rocking my world....I <3 <3 <3 you!! You know who I am talking to... :D
Posted at 2:56 AM Nov 24 from Twitter
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Michelle-Shouldn't of had that 3rd caramel latte. Happy caffeine buzz gone, feeling sick now. Bleh!
Posted at 5:07 PM Nov 23 from Twitter
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Michelle- I'm the happy ray of sunshine that will kick your teeth in!!
Posted at 3:42 PM Nov 23 from Twitter
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Michelle-Always follow your dreams. Except for that one where you're naked in public. I don't think anyone is ready for that.
Posted at 2:16 PM Nov 23 from Twitter
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Michelle- I may not wear the pants in my relationship, but I certainly control the zipper!
Posted at 4:08 AM Nov 23 from Twitter
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Michelle- If magic is a sin....will I go to hell for eating Lucky Charms??? After all they are 'Magically delicious'!
Posted at 6:08 PM Nov 22 from Twitter
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Michelle...If I could be any Barbie, I would be Divorce Barbie...she comes with Ken's house, Ken's car, and Ken's boat....
Posted at 9:00 AM Nov 22 from Twitter
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Michelle....Southern Belles don't whine....we simply express our feelings with loud drawn out words.....
Posted at 5:13 AM Nov 22 from Twitter
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Michelle-I'm thinking of spending the day coming up with new swear words and phrases....any suggestions are welcome!!
Posted at 3:42 PM Nov 21 from Twitter
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Michelle- I think what I really need are some minions to do cater to my every whim....yeah, I like the sound of that!
Posted at 2:57 AM Nov 21 from Twitter
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Michelle- For men who think a woman's place is in the kitchen....just remember this...that is where the knives are kept!
Posted at 4:13 PM Nov 20 from Twitter
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Michelle...I've finally got that Voodoo doll finished, but wouldn't you know it...I can't find my pins!!
Posted at 6:32 AM Nov 20 from Twitter
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Michelle-I have a life......I bought it on E-Bay.....now I'm thinking about asking for a refund.
Posted at 6:47 PM Nov 19 from Twitter
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  • Julie
    Julie Posted at 3:43 AM Nov 21
    rofl, very cute. How are you?? haven't talked in ages!!
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Michelle-When I am asked, "Paper or plastic?" I just say, "It doesn't matter to me, I'm bi-sacksual." You should see the looks I get, hahah
Posted at 3:24 PM Nov 19 from Twitter
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Michelle-I laugh at my own jokes....I'm funny dammit!!
Posted at 8:12 PM Nov 18 from Twitter
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Michelle...When I die, I am gonna haunt people I don't like...and that list is long.....
Posted at 3:35 AM Nov 14 from Twitter
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Michelle...Life's a bitch...and she just had puppies....
Posted at 8:32 PM Nov 10 from Twitter
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Michelle- I think my 4 yr old is gonna grow up to be a Vampire Slayer. He's outside practicing by stabbing the ground with homemade wooden stakes.
Posted at 8:41 PM Nov 9 from Twitter
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Michelle....I can conquer the world with one hand, as long as you're holding the other.
Posted at 5:40 AM Nov 8 from Twitter
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Michelle-CAUTION...this woman contains nudity, bad language, adult themes, and some violence.
Posted at 7:06 PM Nov 7 from Twitter
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Michelle-You only know you can get through life when you know there's that one special person thinking about you <3
Posted at 6:07 AM Nov 7 from Twitter
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Michelle-If you're told just what a bad, useless person you are long enough, you may just start to believe it's true.
Posted at 9:27 PM Nov 6 from Twitter
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Michelle-Have you ever known anyone who made you so miserable you just wished they'd fall into a huge hole and disappear?? Yeah, me too.... :(
Posted at 5:13 AM Nov 6 from Twitter
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Michelle...Where there's a will....I hope my name's in it.... :D
Posted at 9:24 PM Nov 5 from Twitter
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Michelle....I've been doing some thinking.....I know..... it surprised me too! :)
Posted at 4:37 AM Nov 4 from Twitter
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Michelle- Sex is a lot like spades; if you don't have a good partner, then you better have a good hand... ;-)
Posted at 3:01 PM Nov 3 from Twitter
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Michelle-I'm considering suing the Herbal Essences people...I have never, not once had an orgasm from washing my hair...LIARS!!
Posted at 5:10 AM Nov 3 from Twitter
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  • Sheila@home
    Sheila@home Posted at 2:08 PM Nov 3
    Me either! How about class action? lol
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Michelle...Jesus loves you.....but I think you really suck!! :p
Posted at 1:11 AM Nov 3 from Twitter
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Michelle<3 <3 I'm lucky to have someone who loves me just the way I am <3 <3
Posted at 5:42 AM Nov 2 from Twitter
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MichelleThere's no way to wipe off that spiderweb I just walked into without looking like a complete maniac to anyone who may be watching nearby...
Posted at 9:16 PM Oct 30 from Twitter
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Michelle- I believe you should always follow your heart....because it's telling you what you really want..... <3 <3 <3 <3
Posted at 3:12 PM Oct 28 from Twitter
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  • ROBERT
    ROBERT Posted at 12:54 AM Oct 29
    well said again...lol
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MichelleI asked for light, the sun came out, I asked for water, the rain started to pour, I asked for happiness, and you came into my life. <3
Posted at 3:31 AM Oct 28 from Twitter
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Michelle- I'm happy...is that normal??...I'm kinda scared, hehehe.
Posted at 2:19 AM Oct 28 from Twitter
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Michelle...I have a nasty case of pajamaitis and am stuck indoors! SHAME! All cards and gifts welcome.... :(
Posted at 2:14 PM Oct 27 from Twitter
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Michelle- True love is knowing they have your whole world in their hands, and trusting them enough that they won't put it down and walk away. <3 <3
Posted at 5:46 PM Oct 25 from Twitter
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  • Brenda
    Brenda Posted at 1:57 PM Oct 27
    hi shelby have good one
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Michelle- I was going to get a job as greeter for Wal-Mart, but apparently 'Kiss my ass" isn't considered an appropriate greeting!
Posted at 12:44 AM Oct 25 from Twitter
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Michelle- Note to self: My life would be so much easier if my family would quit eating and learn to go naked.....
Posted at 8:54 PM Oct 24 from Twitter
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Michelle-Roses are red. Violets are blue. I love someone. Can you guess who? <3 <3
Posted at 4:04 PM Oct 24 from Twitter
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Michelle- You're sexy, smart, sweet, and funny as hell....God I love my mirror! :D
Posted at 3:46 AM Oct 24 from Twitter
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Michelle~I'm thinking I will be nice tonite. Stop laughing. I think I can really do it this time.
Posted at 11:17 PM Oct 22 from Twitter
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Michelle- Most people say, "You mean the world to me." But the world means nothing to me compared to you....
Posted at 4:08 PM Oct 22 from Twitter
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Michelle~You are my dream when I am not sleeping, my shining star in the afternoon, my sun to guide my way in the middle of the nite. I love you <3
Posted at 6:30 PM Oct 21 from Twitter
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Michelle~Loving someone is great, being loved by someone is fantastic, but being loved by the one you love, well, that's just everything....
Posted at 2:05 AM Oct 21 from Twitter
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  • ROBERT
    ROBERT Posted at 3:35 AM Oct 21
    Well put my friend!!!
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Michelle-If I had a nickel for every time someone complimented me on my charm, beauty, wit and intelligence, I would have 5 cents. Thanks Mom! lol
Posted at 1:51 AM Oct 20 from Twitter
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